Modifying the Body, the Mind, the World
Modifying the Body, the Mind, the World |
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| About this Journal | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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| For a rare few of us, there comes a point in our lives when we look around and realize we can exist outside of an established reality. Some of us modify our bodies. And some take the next step, using body modification as a means of modifying our realities. This journal documents one such adventure through body modification, chaos magick, and how the two have intertwined. Whether you're here for the body modification or the magick, welcome. Links: BMEzine.com BME's IAM Community Sacred Text Archive - Esoteric & Occult |
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| Nov. 28th, 2007 @ 03:00 pm Uncomplicate | |||
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| We all have a multitude of roles and relationships in our lives. Within those relationships, people have certain expectations of us. People have certain boundaries. Our lives are complicated by trying to guess what those expectations are, and trying to live within the boundaries of those we love and cherish. December's goal: uncomplicate. Identify people in your life who matter to you. No matter how well you think you know someone, there is always more to learn. Ask them questions about what is important to them:
UNCOMPLICATE THOSE YOU LOVE BY GETTING TO KNOW THEM BETTER. With the holidays approaching, you will have plenty of opportunities to extend this to numerous people. You don't have to sit down with each and every friend and relative, asking them each hundreds of questions. It's actually far simpler than that. Slip a couple questions into a conversation with each person. Even one question will help. People like to be interacted with. People usually like it when others ask their opinion about something. Even one question will help you uncomplicate those around you a little. If you want to take this one more step, UNCOMPLICATE YOURSELF. Think about someone you know who is easy going. When you're with them, you don't have to worry about what you say or wear. You don't have to worry about what movie you're going to go see, or what types of restaurants you can go to. Now think of someone who is the opposite way - maybe you feel like you have to dress a certain way around them, make sure you don't mention certain things, and they certainly wouldn't want to hear about certain movies, TV shows, or music. You can't change other people, but you can be aware of your own actions. Don't be that person! Let go. Let someone else choose the restaurant. Give input where asked, but don't be demanding. Don't put yourself somewhere where you are going to feel threatened or upset, but give a little. Don't be a victim, but don't be a dictator, either. My family was surprised to hear that I don't like sushi. Every time we're down in San Diego, we go to one of several sushi restaurants. Every time. They were amazed that I don't like sushi, not a little bit, but I think it's the most disgusting thing in the whole world and the mere smell and sight of fish makes me want to hurl. But I've also learned that every sushi restaurant has a killer chicken or beef dish that can put a non-sushi restaurant to shame. My point is, even a vegan can eat at at Black Angus. A carnivore can find something on the salad bar. The bar serves really good non-alcoholic drinks. Go. Be the easy-going person. Find something that works for you wherever you go. And if you're feeling really adventurous, and the situation arises, you can take this one step further. CREATE SOMETHING UNCOMPLICATED. If you're developing a new relationship, be it friend or potential partner, see if you can agree to be uncomplicated. Attempt to make no demands on each other initially. Each of you pay for your own meals or take turns paying. Try to escape roles of dominant and submissive - whoever gets to the door first opens it, for example. The societal norm of a man buying the woman flowers or other gifts, out the window! Uncomplicate. When you remove the complication, you will realize that only one thing remains - each other. You're spending time with them because you enjoy who they are. You enjoy what they talk about. You enjoy the things you do together. I know a lot of people who are surprised that they like the guy they are with because of the gifts he gives them, or because he can put a roof over their head. When you take away the money and the property and the presents, do you like the person you are spending time with? "Mr./Mrs. Right" or the best friend you'll ever have will love you for who you are. It won't matter how much time goes by between visits. It won't matter what they can or can't offer you. It won't matter if you smell bad or are wearing your favorite nasty sweatshirt. And, (this one is admittedly harder for the guys) men and women can be friends without weird sexual tension. Not every female/male pair is waiting for a chance to jump each other's bones. And if you are looking at a potential partner, still uncomplicate. If the other person isn't worried about where the relationship is going, is he/she going to kiss me, at what point in our relationship should we x-y-z, then things evolve naturally and are rooted in something more solid than sex and money. Sometimes things really are that UNCOMPLICATED. Uncomplicate and be uncomplicated. |
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| Nov. 7th, 2007 @ 10:49 pm Timelines, Timeline Decay, and Probability | |||
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| For a moment, let's talk about time, timelines, and options. For every option you have in your life, another timeline is created and branches off. This includes all options, even ones you aren't thinking about. Right now, I could walk outside and take my top off, but chances are, I'm not going to do this. This is where probability enters. Showing the neighbors my boobs has a pretty low probability. Low-probability time lines are like the peak of the swing of a pendulum. It's harder to keep the pendulum up at it's high points, but it will hang straight down rather easily. Straight down, in this analogy, is a high-probability universe. "High-probability" is where almost all people live. It's probably where you are reading this message right now. It's also possible for most people to swing things a little, that is, to achieve something that wasn't likely to work. To achieve a low-probability life-object (family, job, school, fame), it usually takes someone with some level of "magickal" ability to maintain it. That doesn't mean they have to be full-blown pagan, it just means they have an innate ability to do those things necessary on a magickal level to maintain the low-probability situation they've created. It is also possible for the average person to "spike" a low-probability situation. Often, they lack the innate ability to maintain it without effort, and frequently, also lack the magickal background to maintain it with effort (such as with servitors or ritual). You see this situation when someone gets their "15 minutes of fame." If they had an innate ability, they would just be famous. The same is true if they were capable of maintaining the fame with purposeful magick. It would take effort, but they could maintain their fame. But what happens as that timeline (metaphorically) hits 15 minutes and ONE SECOND? Innate magickal ability is not YES or NO. Some people have more innate ability than others. Additionally, some people are better at remembering to maintain their servitors and rituals than others. "Neglecting" a timeline for a person with innate ability could be simply losing interest in what they thought was important, or a change in ideals. "Neglecting" a timeline for everyone else - be it a pagan or just someone who really strongly wanted something - means that they stop doing whatever it was that got them to that lower-probability timeline. For the pagan, that usually means they stop paying attention to their servitors and rituals. For the average person, interestingly, this usually happens when they finally achieve that goal. Because they have what they want, that strong desire is gone. Usually, it is that strong desire that got them on that timeline in the first place. When a timeline is neglected, the path starts to decay. How do you know your timeline is decaying? You'll see it. It will be obvious to you and everyone around you. Suddenly, things go from frighteningly-easy to horribly-difficult. Electronics are usually the first to go on the fritz. Lightbulbs, batteries, appliances - they all have an extremely short lifespan and will die no matter how many times you repair or replace them. And then you'll see chaos creep in - keeping things clean becomes impossible, messes seem to spontaneously appear, plants grow faster, and it seems like nothing is where you left it. You can't seem to hold onto anything, you drop everything, you knock stuff off shelves and counters that you swear you weren't anywhere near. Food spoils faster, bread and crackers go stale, and nothing tastes the same. Friends and family stop calling. Your universe is slowly disappearing. What happens when a low-probability universe reaches maximum decay? One of a few things. The timeline can completely destroy itself. Could nuclear war unravel time and the universe? I guess it's possible, but we're all aware that we need to be careful to avoid such things. As such, the probability is pretty low. But low-probability doesn't mean it can't happen! The timeline where that happens will likely destroy itself. If the timeline doesn't destroy itself, then it simply merges with a more likely timeline. When a low-probability timeline merges with a higher-probability timeline, you lose everything you worked for. You lose everything you had before you switched to a low-probability timeline. In essence, you find yourself completely fucked unless you can create a new low-probability timeline or restart your life in the normal, high-probability timeline. The moral of this story is, if what you have is too good to be true, make sure you realize that and take efforts to maintain that timeline. If what you have is going to shit, try and save the timeline before it decays completely. If you're just generally unhappy, you may be stuck in a high-probability slump because suffering is the general condition of existence. It's okay to want more, to want better. By wanting, by desiring, by yearning, better things will come your way. Inaction is the only wrong answer here. |
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| Oct. 1st, 2007 @ 09:32 pm You Can't Decide Where You're Going Until You Know Where You Are | |||
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| I've always enjoyed the mentality of chaos magick. That mentality, of course, being "do what works." It has allowed me to take bits and pieces from various occult teachings, rituals, and traditions, and make them into something personal. Following the crowd has rarely worked for me. I have a difficult time following one path word-for-word. Although many paths or teachings have much to teach, I always come across parts that are straight up ludicrous or unnecessary. I don't need to memorize the history of the path and all of it's little stories to make the rest of the rituals, spells, and concoctions work. For the longest time, I allowed (or almost insisted) that my path remain nameless. I felt that, by assigning it a name, I would become tied to whatever that name implied. When I discovered Chaos Magick in 2001, I said to myself, "yes, this is what I've been doing all along." It fit. And better than that, it gave ample room for change. In fact, it practically insisted upon it. Part of finding things worth repeating is trying lots of things that don't. Do not be discouraged by failure. And yes, I call it failure. I don't see any need to sugar-coat my failures. I don't need a pick me up. I need to learn. I need to be practical about what doesn't work. For me, I need to label it a failure and move on. If you can't say "I'm fat" or "I'm ugly" or "I do stupid things," then you have no place to start. You must be comfortable and realistic with your "drawbacks" if you ever hope to change them. Hate is a strong and magickly powerful emotion. If you hate something about yourself, admit it. Harness that energy and start to trying to change/fix that trait. You can't decide where you're going until you identify where you ARE. Observe yourself. Know yourself. And keep in mind, not all societal norms are "required." If you believe you are an asshole and you're okay with it, move onto a trait that you would like to change. No one says you have to conform. Who makes the rules here? You do. Who decides what is "desirable"? You do! With this in mind, you must also have a realistic understanding of the world around you. If you want a girlfriend and you're a complete slob, you are probably going to have to change that trait even if your filth doesn't bother you. This is part of the practical balance between the mundane and the magickal. |
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| Oct. 1st, 2007 @ 04:47 pm Disecting "Principa Chaotica" | |||
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| From "Principa Chaotica" by Peter Carroll, we learn: "In Chaos Magic, beliefs are not seen as ends in themselves, but as tools for creating desired effects. To fully realize this is to face a terrible freedom in which Nothing is True and Everything is Permitted, which is to say that everything is possible, there are no certainties, and the consequences can be ghastly. Laughter seems to be the only defence against the realisation that one does not even have a real self." Are our beliefs based on our observances? Or do our beliefs shape our reality? Chaos magick suggests that what you set your mind to believing has a power over your reality. If you just simply "know" that new job is yours, it sways the cosmos in your favor. That doesn't mean it's a "slam dunk," it just means that the level of your belief and commitment to said belief has an affect on your existence. If you BELIEVE that wearing mismatched socks brings you luck, it probably will. If you BELIEVE that you are fucked and doomed, guess what? Your belief affects your reality. On a logical, observance-based note, think of the last situation noted above. People who believe they won't succeed frequently don't. There is a tangible portion to the outcome of this belief. If you believe you won't succeed, you usually act like you won't succeed. You won't put effort into anything because you believe there is no point. If you couple that lack of physical contribution with the magickal side of this, it increases the likelihood of failure. If you go through the motions but still believe you won't succeed, you will have to work twice as hard to get by. If you can get to a place in your mind where it is possible that you might succeed and you give it a little real-life effort, things get easier. When you can believe - if only temporarily - that you are a god and your servitors exist to make your life better, even the real-world tasks get easier. When you believe you are the god of kingdom come, you act like it, and others will act like it too. The unseen world wraps around the concept, and the cards start falling in your favor more and more often. Now, I said "if only temporarily." The adept magician learns to change his/her belief as the situation fits. The beliefs do not need to be consistent. Actually, the more easily the magician can switch between beliefs, the easier it becomes to manipulate reality. As Carroll states, laughter is our only defense against the realization that we don't even have a self. If you can laugh off the belief after you have embraced it, it will be easier to bounce in and out of beliefs as you see fit. |
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